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Epiphany of the Lord

In the Feast of the Epiphany, the church celebrates the manifestation to the world of the newborn Christ as Messiah, Son of God, and Savior of the world.  Today, we celebrate the adoration of Jesus by the wise men from the East.  The wise men represent the “nations” of the world - that Jesus was born for all people, and that he is the fulfillment of the longing of every human heart.  The wise men were pagans, i.e., non-Jews, most likely practitioners of an Eastern religion, but God manifested himself to them.  We might even consider them scientists of a sort - seeking meaning and trying to make sense of what they observed in nature.  It was the presence of a star - something in nature that fascinated them, that moved them to set out on a journey that would lead them to God.  They didn’t set out trying to find God, they were simply pursing what was of interest to them - what they found attractive.  They were astronomers or astrologers - star gazers - and when they saw a star that was mysterious - extraordinary, they wanted to discover the reason for its appearance.  They wanted to know the “why” behind the reality they observed.  They were employing reason because reason seeks the ultimate reason or meaning behind the existence of all things.  The Epiphany shows us that God uses our interests and events in nature - our experience - if we are attentive to them - to lead us to discover him.  God calls us in this way.  As with the star of Bethlehem, “epiphanies” of God are associated with “seeing the light” - not literally, but figuratively.  An epiphany is a profound awareness of something significant in our lives - something that clarifies or sheds light on the direction of our lives and moves us.  An epiphany is a revelation - an event that in a sense “pulls back the veil” and allows the splendor or glory of God to break through into our lives.  It is a grace - something given to us that we can’t control or make happen. 

          When I reflect on my own experience, my own journey to the priesthood, I can see that God used the same method to draw me to himself as he did the Magi.  In seeking my path in life - my career, I did not set out looking for God - saying to myself, “how do I become a priest.”  I was simply pursuing my interests - in my case, law and politics - thinking that in them I could find meaning and purpose in my life.  One of the first epiphanies that I had was when I was working as a paralegal for a New York law firm.  I wanted to work there because that is where the money was.  But the epiphany I had after less than a year at the firm was that money could not buy happiness.  I would say at the time in my early twenties, that I knew that having money could not make you happy, but did I really believe it?  I was acting and living and making decisions as if I thought money was the path to happiness.  I was working closely with partners in the firm who had more money than they knew what to do with, but they were not happy.  In fact, they were mostly miserable.  I remember laying in bed one night in a hotel after a fancy dinner thinking, “Is this it? Is this what it is all about?  There has to be more to life than this.”  It was an epiphany.  I knew at the core of my being that I was made for more and that a legal career was not it, but I still sought the fulfillment of my interests in a worldly way.  In search of the newborn king, the Magi go to the seat of earthly power in the Jewish Kingdom.  They go to Jerusalem.  Makes sense.  I had an interest in politics, so why not go to the center of political power in the United States?  Soon after leaving the law firm, I moved to the Washington, D.C. area to make my way in politics.  After working at a Congressman’s office, a think-tank and advocacy group, and then several different public relations firms, I was frustrated and disillusioned.  I was close to power, doing what I thought I wanted to do, but I was not happy.  At one point, between jobs, I was stressed out about finding work.  A counselor I was seeing suggested that to give myself a break from the job-hunt and to not get overly obsessed with finding a new job, that I volunteer someplace one day each week.  There was a homeless shelter a few blocks from where I lived.  I walked passed it on my way to work most days but didn’t pay much attention to it.  I stopped in one day and offered to volunteer.  To my surprise, I really enjoyed it.  I was not making any money, but I was happy.  I was happy working with the poor - those who had no power.  This was shocking to me because it was not what I expected at all.  And I had to pursue this fact.  Why was it that in working with the poor I became “radiant” and my heart began to throb and overflow?  This was an epiphany.  We find ourselves by giving ourselves away.  We are made not for money and power, but for love.  Still not knowing what this all meant, I began to look into graduate programs in social work.  It was then that a dream put the idea of the priesthood before me, and I set off on the path that led to the seminary. 

          St. Paul makes reference to his “epiphany” - “that the mystery was made known to me by revelation”.  We know that Paul experienced a breakthrough of God’s grace  - a light - that changed the direction of his life.  These epiphanies happen not just for our own conversion, but that we become “stewards” of God’s grace.  Paul has this experience of being chosen at a particular time and place so that God’s promise of the Good News can be extended to all the nations.  The epiphany expands his understanding (he has a conversion of mind and heart) and sends him on mission.  When we are attentive to the epiphanies in our life and follow them with wonder and humility, not thinking we know what they mean or where they will lead us, we will experience a richness to life beyond what we imagined was possible.  Our gifts are then used for God’s purpose.  God’s light goes before us to open our eyes to the light of faith - that we are chosen and wanted by God to participate in the mystery of salvation.  If we follow the interests that God has placed in our heart, we need not fear the journey.  The journey purifies those interests and reveals that God dwells among us.  O come let us adore Him!